Fucking assholes

Man... I don't get it. Seriously.
I was called by the DOS of Empik, a famous English school not only in Krakow but the whole of Poland as well. She said that she needed someone to substitute for a teacher who was sick. She didn't know exactly when she would be back, maybe soon, maybe never again. She gave me this bunch of groups at fucking IBM to teach Business English which, as you guys know, is not my cup of tea. No, wrong sentence. It's nothing at all to me, I've never taught it, don't know how to, don't know the lingo, even in Portuguese.
But then I thought 'Hey, finally some money in my pocket'.
But apparently this sick teacher, Julia something, is adored by all her students. I've worked three days so far and no one showed up in two. No fucking one. The only class I I was ablr to teach three guys out of nine showed up and only one was really taking part. The other two were decorative plants. I felt awful.
This people have no consideration AT ALL. AT ALL. Ok, they might love the teacher for whatever reason, but hey, I've nothing to do with it. They accepted a substitute teacher and now they're boycoting me big time. I have to put up with this shit!
And today I met one of the teachers, Matthew, who's British. I couldn't understand a single word he was saying! He would speak to me and I guessed what he was saying. Many times I said the good old 'sorry?' And he kept asking all this questions... I think he sensed something. His class was full today and I waited 20 fucking minutes before asking the receptionist to sign the fucking sheet. She said "they're waisting your time"
"It's OK"
But no, it wasn't OK at all! I left that fucking place almost crying. It takes me one hour's walk to get home. I just wanted all of them to shove it! Shove it up their fucking asses, man!
I know I'm getting paid for the hour anyway, but the atmosphere is awful. Those guys keep looking at me and talking in fucking Polish and I don't understand anything. Hey man! It's not my fucking fault that the woman got sick or fucking left the job or whatever. Fucking assholes.
And I still have to plan my trip on Labour Day because I must leave the country every three months since I'm still on a tourist visa. I think Junior is coming with me but I'm not sure. I have to go anyway.

I'm so pissed, man... fucking assholes.

I just wanted to get there and scream in good Portuguese:
'Vao tomar no cu seus filho-da-puta!'

"The more I give the less I get
I'm all set, I'm all set
Skin and bones, skin and bones, skin and bones don't you know
I'm just getting bones"

"I went to fuck some ass"

Saturday I didn't wanna do anything. Junior was out working late, Patricia left the house in the morning and only came back at night and I watched the BBC the whole day. Good programmes on climate change.
I went to the market in the afternoon to buy some stuff and spent all the money I had on me, which wasn't much. Junior wanted to go to Coccoon and I wasn't in the mood. He got home and we drank a couple of beers. Then EW arrived and seemed like a snail in the house. I thought 'hey, I'm not gonna stay here in the house with her', so I decided to go with him.
We started a bailinho and went to the club almost 1am. Pawel was there with a guy and we went to the big dancefloor. I danced all night, but did not have 16 beers, if you know what I mean. But it was OK.
At some point we went to the bar upstairs to buy drinks and hang out with the guys Junior knows. Two guys came to talk with me, they both said they were gay but wanted to talk to me I don't know why. They were wasted and couldn't articulate, even worse than I normally get to be on my fun nights. When one of them started asking the same questions twice I just turned around and started speaking with Pawel. He was with this really ugly guy but seemed to be enjoying himself.
About 5am I wanted to go home and do a chill-out bailinho, we still had one beer left and some vodca, if it was the case. I borrowed 5 zl from Junior to buy cigarettes and went home.
Junior stayed there until 7am and in the meantime he received a text from Pawel:
"I went to fuck some ass, talk to you later"

We met him on Sunday at Kolory, he was so happy after the ugly-guy sex spree and even gave us a discount on the cigarettes.
A couple of friends of Junior's joined us and it was fun.

I downloaded a software to change the region of the DVD and finally got to watch a movie I bought in London. Dazed and Confused.
Nothing much, trying to sort some things out.
There's this fucking little shitty 4-year-old running around the place here and all the time banging my chair. Family doesn't give a shit. I want to leave my foot accidently in his way. Fucking shitty piece of shit.

The most beautiful day in Krakow

Never thought that I could experience this kind of weather here in Krakow right now. Junior said by this time last year it was still snowing. It must be 25 degrees in the sun.
Junior and I went to have a pint outside the bar, smoked and talked before I came here to Kolory. He had to go to his school but he'll meet me here later in the day. We went home for him to get some shit and me to get my computer and EW has there watching Mexican soap opera sitting in the cold living room. The apartment is colder than outside, just like mine was in Brazil.

I forgot my lighter at home, but at least they have some matches at the counter. I wish Pawel has here to give me the discount. Oh well... But I'm guessing he's working tonight, maybe he'll start at 5pm, because tomorrow he's off and he wants to go out. I don't know if we're going because we want to enjoy Sunday afternoon in Kazimierz's bars. There's also stalls selling second-hand items, we want to come and check it out.

I went to the corner store next to the house to buy some credits for my cell phone and every time I go there the man asks in German if I speak German. I go there every day! I've already said "nie" a hundred times but it doesn't matter to him. He doesn't care. he likes asking that question and hey, whatever turns him on, man...

I think things are starting to look good, let's see. Hope is the last one to die, literally translating.
Junior had a bit of a "chat" with EW yesterday. He wanted to do it without me in the house. I was here anyway and told him to do his thing. She's been quite ever since and I don't know if she's thinking about what to do with her life. Probably not.
I tried to convince her to get her shit and go to Spain or Portugal, as she has this big problem with English. She still has a plane ticket back to Brazil, so she might as well try it for a couple of months and if it doesn't work out she can pack her shit and go back to the village she used to live. She said she would think about it but I guess when I was saying that she had like a balloon or cloud-thought over her had with Snickers bars jumping over a fence, just like Homer, man!
But anyway, Junior said that if we have to switch apartments he doesn't want to live with her, than she'll be fucked up big time. He said it wasn't his problem.

Well, most beautiful day! That's happening!
Rynek must be packed with tourists, having pints outside. But the bars stick a little knife in our stomachs with the prices. Impossible to go there all the time, maybe on a Sunday afternoon and when it's hotter.

And about the pics... well, Ro, that's what bailinho is all about!
Looking forward to looking like this overseas!
Put the Stellas in the fridge!

Drunken bailinho nights

Cyntia eats shit

But what's the concept of 'shit' anyway?
I've been swimming in shit for a while now, but not literally. Have I been eating non-literal shit? I guess man...
We went to Kitsch on Monday. The word that best sums it up is: shit...
But, hey, non literal...
In the middle of my third pint at Kolory, as usual. Holiday's over, I'm sitting next to the garden, but it's kinda chilli and the fucking bitch bartender asked if it was ok to leave the door open.
"Hey, I don't know, it's kinda chilly but whatever"
She left it open. Fucking bitch.
EW arrives tonight, I got a message from her and she would be at the house around 8pm. It's 6:15pm right now and I don't feel like going home.

Just closed the door right now. Fuck 'em all.
I feel like having another pint (what a shock), but I still need to go to the market because there's no food back in the house. There's only some stuff left from the Easter breakfast, which is - shocking again! - HAM. We ate the pickled eggs already.
Or maybe I shouldn't eat anything at all, kinda have to lose weight. But I haven't eaten the whole fucking day, only draining the fucking beer. I feel good right now. Drinking on an empty stomach makes you enjoy the shit even better. The problem is the bathroom every 15 minutes...

I've seen every kind of people coming and going here. They have like a projet of a capuccino or latte, thinking that they just had a whale of a coffee, get their things and go. What are they thinking? Coming to a bar for a fucking latte and go? In the middle of the afternoon? Why don't you just order that fucking pint and get real? Couples sitting together and saying 'na prawde?' all the time. If it's a first date it is ok to make a good impression, but they're not on their first date, though they act like they are. Fucking wierdoes, man...
I'm ordering another one. Fuck EW.
There's pie back in the house. A little sugary thing. And I think there's one Tatra left from Monday. Maybe I should buy some more on my way home. And Viceroy.
"Tell my mom I'm doing fine, doing fine, doing fine....
Skin and bones, skin and bones, skin and bones don't you know...
I'm just skin and bones..."

I hate to change 50s. It seems that I have a lot but it's all an illusion, man... But I have no coins left here so I might as well do it. What a dilemma... Tatras back in the house or one more pint? I don't get to go online there... And here my zlotych are continually thrown down the drain as piss. But what the hell, man? Let's do it!

Well, some interesting guys sitting at the bar, but why should I bother? I'm already on my forth pint and it's fucking 6:30pm, I don't think I can articulate at this point, even though I don't look like I've been drinking, so I think. Junior went to work, he'll be back at 11pm.
"It's your cold day in the sun
Looks like your bleeding heart has already won"
There's a dog next to the counter. There's always a dog haging around here. The interesting thing is that dogs get to travel and enter countries with no problem. Just a couple of shots maybe and bam! they're out there, man! Barking and shitting the streets up with noooo problem.... AND they get to have VIP treatment, at least in Europe. As for Brazilians it isn't that easy... We get the dog's treatment.

Service here is not so good. The table before me has been dirty for 20 minutes. Back in Silvios it wouldn't be like that. Even though I'm a regular only Pawel gives us a discount, fucking bastards.
The guy with a broom yells at somebody. A bit of a problem in the other room. Fuck it, it's not my problem. A family just went to the garden and left the door ajar. Fuckers. I think they're deciding on the extensive menu of liquor, two little fucking shitty 12-year-old bastards with a foot ball are talking so loud that I can hear them with my iPod on. Fucking kids, just go the hell. This is a fucking bar, the parents should be locked up. If you don't have a babysitter just get hammered at home and stop bothering the regulars.

6:55pm. Clock is ticking and EW would be at home in one hour and a half.
There's still some sunlight outside. But not enough for sunglasses. I hate walking the streets at this time, especially if I've had a few ones. I know I'll zigzag my way home, thank God it's close, about 7 minute's walk. I feel like going to the bathroom, number 2. Damn! I knew it! I have to go the market anyway for toilet paper. I've been rationing it for the last two days, as the shops were closed and the off-licenses charge you a fucking 5 zl for four rolls. Bastards. But I'll go for number 1 anyway here.
I'm lighting it up as there would be no tomorrow, man... One pack of Viceroy down, and it's only 7:10pm.
"I'm just skin and bones..."

I've kinda been disconnected and connected again. I guess it's time to go. 7:37pm, even though I would pour myself a couple of pints if I could.... Damn, we've gotta have another key set pronto. I don't think I'll come back later, it's kind of a drag. But being at home with EW it much more of a drag. I don't know, gotta decide on it.
Oh well...
And Cyntia eats shit alright.

Thank God the holiday is almost over.
Everything closed, exchange places, stores, only a few off-licenses.
No good places to go.
I talked to Ro on Friday and Adri on Sunday. Good to chat with them for a while.

I don't know. Kinda in an island here. Bought some songs on iTunes.
I did a Foo Fighters bailinho on Saturday. It was great. On Sunday I was totally hungover for the Easter breakfast at Suzana's. I looked and felt like a zombie.
Seweryn texted me asking for my postal address to send me his wedding invitation. I wanted to go but don't see that happening. I really wanted to go to Warszawa... Oh well...

Nothing much going on.
I had good news from Tony, my manager from Silvios. I'll drop him a line later in the week.

"Yesterday, there was so many things
I was never told
Now that I'm startin' to learn
I feel I'm growing old
'Cause yesterday's got nothin' for me
Old pictures that I'll always see
Time just fades the pages
In my book of memories
Prayers in my pocket
And no hand in destiny
I'll keep on movin' along
With no time to plant my feet
'Cause yesterday's got nothin' for me
Old pictures that I'll always see
Some things could be better
If we'd all just let them be
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Got nothin' for me

Yesterday, there was so many things
I was never shown
Suddenly this time I found
I'm on the streets and I'm all alone
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Old pictures that I'll always see
I ain't got time to reminisce old novelties
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Yesterday"

"Elephant woman, stay away from me..."

Sorry, Ro, I had to use your little song. You got yourself rid of your EW and I managed to find one in Polish lands.
THANK GOD SHE EMBARKED ON THAT TRAIN THIS MORNING!
HOORAY!!!

It's been a beautiful day. Kinda colder than the others, but the sun is shining and I feel great, for a moment I could forget about all the problems. But just for a moment.

Junior is doing some things with Suzana and I came to Kolory to have a beer, a cig and watch some Foo Fighters videos on YouTube. YouTube is everything, man...
The other day I watched Guns N Roses in fucking Rock in Rio II, fucking 1991, playing 'Estranged'. I couldn't stop smiling and loving it. It'd been ages, when I had the brilliant idea of recording a Pearl Jam album (Ten) over the Rock in Rio concert, since I listened to it. Estranged, man...

I think Junior and I are going out tonight. Going to fucking Kitsch. Easter is coming and these people don't work for six fucking days. The holiday is from today (Thursday) to next Tuesday. They all go back to their hometowns and stay with their families. In Brazil we would probably go to the beach (not me), or mountains or stay in the city and drink in the bar. Weird people over here...
So we're going to the market to buy booze and food for the holiday, do a bailinho and try to have fun. Kolory will be open, I guess, but not on Sunday. Nothing opens on Easter Sunday (well, even in London it doesn't). We were invited to have breakfast at Suzana's this day, even though we don't feel like going. But as we don't pay rent we have to show our faces from time to time.

You know, the atmosphere in the house is already great. I woke up when she left at 7am to lock the door and when back to sleep. Junior woke up around 8:30am and I got up at 9:30am. I went to the kitchen, he was listening to some music, and the first thing he said was:
'I'm so happy that she left...'
Her fucking cousin, man!
Then I went to exchange some money, bought a kind of a donut they sell on the corners here (I don't know the name but it costs 1 zl), went to the book store to see a book for my future students and then to the market. Once again the women behind the cheese and meat counter ignored me, but in other days that would have really gotten on my nerves. But not today. I waited until eventually one of them came to serve me. I bought my cheese, then two chicken breasts and 'chicken hearts' (I don't know if this is the correct name). She even taught me how to say 'half a kilo', which of course I already forgot. On my way home, I listened to Foo Fighters singing along aloud, never did that in my life before. People would look at me but I didn't care. I was wearing my new sunglasses that I bought the day before yeasterday.

The sunglasses situation started when Junior and I decided to buy our Easter supply at a market far away, but it's cheaper there. We would have to take the tram. We bought the tickets and got on the bastard, but the next stop we were told to get off. I wasn't undersdanding and Junior neither. Then a girl came to talk to us in English and she was going to the same station. We followed her to another tram and when we were getting on the driver told everybody to leave. The thing was: there had been and accident on the way to that market and the trams weren't doing the route. We got sooo pissed. We did what anybody would have done in this situation: went for a beer.
We went to Offycina and had a pint, then walked through Rynek window shopping. At this store we saw some shades and there was this great Ray-Ban-like one. My shades were awful, dirty, broken, sliding off my nose, so I spent the grocery money on new ones. Then Junior, in the next shop, bought a perfume and and anti-aging cream for the area around the eyes. He also spent the grocery money. But we felt better. We talked shit, walked slowly towards home and prepared supper.
I went to my room, which now has a wardrobe and a sofa and Foo Fighters pics that Adri borrowed form a girl at the radio station, and finished reading the second Agatha Cristie book.
I know, Ro, Agatha Shmagatha, but at least I wasn't putting up with the EW.

Now in Kolory, seeing people coming and going, slowly drinking my Tyskie (they don't sell Zywiec) and smoking my cigarette, which, I hope for a brief moment, is not Marlboro. Junior and I went for Viceroy big time. But desperate times require desperate measures.
And horray. Elephant Woman is finally away.

Well, I guess I'm close to reaching bottom. Seriously.
Junior and I keep looking at each other and saying 'what now?'
Patricia sits there and eats every five minutes. She's huge. She watches TV (they were able to connect the cable from Junior's room) while we're trying to talk in the kitchen. Then she turns the volume up. There is a different soap opera every hour in a different channel, she knows them all. Then she switches off the TV and goes to her room and lies there, sometimes reading a book, sometimes just for the sake of it. Then when we're hungry, after not eating anything at all the whole day, she smells the food, goes to the kitchen and say that she wants to cook afterwards, so we better hurry up. When she sees that somebody have woken up, she leaves her room and goes take a shower first, not letting anybody else use it. Dead weight, man... dead weight...
Now Junior sees what's going on there. He asked me today 'Does she do that all the time? Every day?'
'Yep'
'Jesus Chirst'
'Yep'
I'm wearing white nail polish now, you guys know I love it. If you don't, just don't look at it or fucking keep it to yourself. Yeasterday she said I seem to have used 'Errorex'. I didn't say a word. We were at Kolory and I was drinking my beer and trying to enjoy it. Later on, when we had to switch tables because they were gonna close the area, we went to sit at the bar. Junior and I love the counter. She was hating it. Then, she made her shitty comment again. I just had a sip of my beer, looked at her and said
'Hey, Patricia, I've been using this nail polish since I was 17. My mom's always hated it and she used to make the very same remark. So, if you don't like it, you either don't look at it or keep your mouth shut'
'Ai, I'm sorry, but you don't need to be rude'
I didn't say anything, and Junior said 'Well, I like it. So, let's have a ciggy?'

Then, Junior and I started to talk about movies, gross ones, describing scenes with shit, barf, farts and things related. We were loving it. She just kept saying
'Stop talking about this!!!'
The more she said it, the more we were doing it.
She doesn't swear, doesn't have fun, the only thing she does best is to eat all the time and talk about your flaws.
And I've been living with this moron for two months now.
I'm bitter, man... bitter...
And I'm sure I'm gonna go home and she'll be there, going out of her way to BE in our way and making stupid remarks.
She's been quiet today, maybe she kinda sensed that Junior and I have had it with her.

I'm just counting the days for her to get on that train to Czszwykscieswie or whatever the name of the city is and give us some peace for a few days.
Being on my limit... that's happening, alright.